Tuesday, March 20, 2007
morning journal. mmmm...
The jade stones that awaited us, just laying in the grass by our journal spot.
ah, what a magnificent world, ocean, view, smell, feeling, Life
Adam and I witnessing the light of day roll into shore, overtaking nightshadows wave by wave.
Me and Adam after a delicious breakfast of stuffed french toast and eggs benedict at Deetchen's in Big Sur
Little did we know the dignified woman who was taking our picture was a photographer, she really wanted us to smooch for the camera. Oh, cuteness!
The outside view of Deetchan's....such a lovely little nook in the crook of HWY 1.
Can I live in a hollowed out redwood, pleeeeaaase?
through a big tree, like a passage to the upperworld!
Me and Abe outside Nicole's house in Los Angeles, California
I found an ocean to put my feet in...so beautiful!
...and SOooO cold!
Morro Bay Up Highway 1...fishing village feels like home
Southern part of the Big Sur area, a lovely German guy
hitching his way up the coast took this photo
Offering to Death Valley as I enter her wild womb...
I made it deliriously to the first tourist hub!
Nate and I at Good Ole' Stovepipe Wells, Hey, they've got showers.
Closing Ceremony in Death Valley.
The view of the valley in Abidiania
Brad, me, and Andreas on the meditation hill
Sunset view from the Casa, where John of God does his work
Ah...beautiful cows in the valley
Topher in the hammock at our Pousada in Abidiania, Brazil the first half in February
Monday, March 19, 2007
haaaa...inundation shamama overload.
who needs psychotropic experiences with this kind of work?! Wow. We have practiced soul retrieval, extraction, dismemberment/initiation, bringing back healing designs and soul images, done tracking, dream dance, passed power, long distance work. I thas been a full...6 days. 6 hours a day for 6 days.
We did get a little break last night when they had an african drum group come and we got to dance it out! oh, that was fabulous. With all the fantastic food and sedentary class time, not to mention intaking so much information, we all needed to just let go. And this morning we also had off, so after breakfast I soaked in the hot tub until the cold morning fog burned off, then sunned and warmed myself on the deck until the lunch bell rang. It was delicious.
My body feels flipped inside out from all of this work. With Brazil and a Vision Quest before this, I am beginning to feel the challenge of keeping up with the integration portion of the work. It's like a flashback to Massage School when I was doing so much learning as far as theory goes, and also receiving and giving so much healing...very intense.
folding laundry this afternoon was so gloriously ordinary.
I know I am so expanded and sensitive, I am a little nervous about leaving. Venturing out into the wide world once again to the land of gas stations and chaotic energy. What I do look forward to is playing music in my car really loud ans singing along. I imagine I will still be into Melissa Ethridge's "Yes, I am" album. so good for my soul right now, lovin' it. lovin' it loud.
so.
Another gift of today beyond laundry and lounging, was getting to sit down with Tom, an elder who lives just on the southern boarder of redwoods national park, to plan out the final leg of this reawakening tour. From Sonoma, I am going to take 128 toward the coast, stopping in Hendy Woods near Philo to camp along the way. Then up HWY 1 for more crashing ocean beautiness until I curve inland a bit to 101. From there, I crawl reverently through the Avenue of Giants in Humboldt Redwoods State Park. Wonderment will overtake me, and I will most likely hike in to camp for two nights in the backcountry. From my redwoods haven I will emerge to cruise coastward and cityward to Ferndale, where there is a lovely little Victorian Town. I have always had a fascination with victorian architecture and am excited to check it out for a day. Then, it's up 101 again for some coastal camping perhaps? as I make my way to Redwoods National Park outside of Orick. Whether I stay in that park or in Prairie Creek or Gold Bluff, I've yet to decide. Wherever I land, I hope to camp out for a couple nights and sink back into the coastal energy a bit. Once I write in the sand and let the tide wash so many prayers into the belly of the ocean, it will be time to sing goodbye to the Pacific. I will drive east to commune with the wondrous Mount Shasta, a giant spirit of a volcano just north of Redding. I want to honor the volcano of myself and the VolcAno of The Mama, either on my birthday or the day after. At the great giantess Shastina's feet, my reawakening tour will end...With all my sage burned, prayers spoken, and loving kisses rendered, I will zoom zoom home to Boulder to work on the 3rd of April, or maybe the 2nd (this is something I should check on).
Originally, I planned to be home on my birthday, then on the 1st for the full moon, but Oh! the beauty of the wild. I want to roll in it and taste it until I am so IT, that when I return to the village I have wildness overflowing and radiating to share with all of the beautiful family friends sisters brothers. I pray that I will carry in me soul love from ocean, desert, forest, and volcano to feed me and you long after my return. oh, yes, and radiant moon! She's just the best.
I leave you with a wisdom nugget from tonight's session:
When we are dis-membered, a space opens to re-member. That is, to re-member our unity with the divine beyond ego, and so to remember the beauty of our individual soul.
yay!
Hearts and Xs and Os,
who needs psychotropic experiences with this kind of work?! Wow. We have practiced soul retrieval, extraction, dismemberment/initiation, bringing back healing designs and soul images, done tracking, dream dance, passed power, long distance work. I thas been a full...6 days. 6 hours a day for 6 days.
We did get a little break last night when they had an african drum group come and we got to dance it out! oh, that was fabulous. With all the fantastic food and sedentary class time, not to mention intaking so much information, we all needed to just let go. And this morning we also had off, so after breakfast I soaked in the hot tub until the cold morning fog burned off, then sunned and warmed myself on the deck until the lunch bell rang. It was delicious.
My body feels flipped inside out from all of this work. With Brazil and a Vision Quest before this, I am beginning to feel the challenge of keeping up with the integration portion of the work. It's like a flashback to Massage School when I was doing so much learning as far as theory goes, and also receiving and giving so much healing...very intense.
folding laundry this afternoon was so gloriously ordinary.
I know I am so expanded and sensitive, I am a little nervous about leaving. Venturing out into the wide world once again to the land of gas stations and chaotic energy. What I do look forward to is playing music in my car really loud ans singing along. I imagine I will still be into Melissa Ethridge's "Yes, I am" album. so good for my soul right now, lovin' it. lovin' it loud.
so.
Another gift of today beyond laundry and lounging, was getting to sit down with Tom, an elder who lives just on the southern boarder of redwoods national park, to plan out the final leg of this reawakening tour. From Sonoma, I am going to take 128 toward the coast, stopping in Hendy Woods near Philo to camp along the way. Then up HWY 1 for more crashing ocean beautiness until I curve inland a bit to 101. From there, I crawl reverently through the Avenue of Giants in Humboldt Redwoods State Park. Wonderment will overtake me, and I will most likely hike in to camp for two nights in the backcountry. From my redwoods haven I will emerge to cruise coastward and cityward to Ferndale, where there is a lovely little Victorian Town. I have always had a fascination with victorian architecture and am excited to check it out for a day. Then, it's up 101 again for some coastal camping perhaps? as I make my way to Redwoods National Park outside of Orick. Whether I stay in that park or in Prairie Creek or Gold Bluff, I've yet to decide. Wherever I land, I hope to camp out for a couple nights and sink back into the coastal energy a bit. Once I write in the sand and let the tide wash so many prayers into the belly of the ocean, it will be time to sing goodbye to the Pacific. I will drive east to commune with the wondrous Mount Shasta, a giant spirit of a volcano just north of Redding. I want to honor the volcano of myself and the VolcAno of The Mama, either on my birthday or the day after. At the great giantess Shastina's feet, my reawakening tour will end...With all my sage burned, prayers spoken, and loving kisses rendered, I will zoom zoom home to Boulder to work on the 3rd of April, or maybe the 2nd (this is something I should check on).
Originally, I planned to be home on my birthday, then on the 1st for the full moon, but Oh! the beauty of the wild. I want to roll in it and taste it until I am so IT, that when I return to the village I have wildness overflowing and radiating to share with all of the beautiful family friends sisters brothers. I pray that I will carry in me soul love from ocean, desert, forest, and volcano to feed me and you long after my return. oh, yes, and radiant moon! She's just the best.
I leave you with a wisdom nugget from tonight's session:
When we are dis-membered, a space opens to re-member. That is, to re-member our unity with the divine beyond ego, and so to remember the beauty of our individual soul.
yay!
Hearts and Xs and Os,
Monday, March 12, 2007
I have arrived at the Foundation for Shamanic Studies' Two-Week Intensive in Sonoma, CA. Wow! The work is intense so far, and I imagine will only deepen. The food is gourmet and abundant and after fasting and camping and then just not having money to spend on food--fuel for the car is first priority!--having three meals a day has been really significant. My journeying muscles are tired, not having done this kind of work in this way for years. I have realized the way I access and work with spirit is very much influenced by this style, and yet as my own work shows up very differently. I look forwrad to sharing with my community the growth I am sure to experience here.
With the vision quest only one week behind me I am still integrating the gifts received there and haven't had much of a chance to really look over my notes from my solo time and begin to really chew on those juicy bits...some prominent lessons I am able to work on here, though, and I am thankful for that. I have re-membered myself in a way that feels so tender and new and am learning that it will take some time to blossom into that new sense of wholeness. During a journey in the fall I was terrified to let go of the old axis mundi, not because the new one was going to be bad, but because I was so terrified of the space between, where I would not be sure how to orientate myself in the world, my inner world or outer world. I now feel like I am walking that space in between worlds, the new and the old. It is difficult because of this liminal sense to chat with folks I am meeting at this workshop about what I do and where I live...it all feels foreign and old or strange. Old story. I realize now more than before what Don Juan means by erasing personal history. Every time someone asks me a mundane question I feel as though they are asking me to reconfirm my personal history, to re-cement myself in my old roles and ways of being. Which is pretty normal, this is waht we do as humans in community, we have roles.
I am curious to experience my return home to Boulder. Very glad to have the task of redecorating my room to reflect myself as this initiated woman. And talk with friends slowly, quietly about what I have brought back. To share myself gently and wildly as the case may be in a way that makes me feel alive with my community. I want to go camping more.
ahhhh...well, back to class for the evening session. Please write or call if you like, I do get phone and internet reception here. It could be nice to talk with the folks at home.
I have been so grateful to have all of the treasures sent along from trail mix, which I finished just days ago, and stones, and camping gear, and medicines, and power objects. I made a little altar in the console of my car and have made many offerings along the way with your gifts...I look forward to sharing with each of you how your gift has travelling with me, how it was offered to the earth sky fire and so on...I would love to hear how all of you are doing as well...grateful to touch in with the circle.
LOVE.
With the vision quest only one week behind me I am still integrating the gifts received there and haven't had much of a chance to really look over my notes from my solo time and begin to really chew on those juicy bits...some prominent lessons I am able to work on here, though, and I am thankful for that. I have re-membered myself in a way that feels so tender and new and am learning that it will take some time to blossom into that new sense of wholeness. During a journey in the fall I was terrified to let go of the old axis mundi, not because the new one was going to be bad, but because I was so terrified of the space between, where I would not be sure how to orientate myself in the world, my inner world or outer world. I now feel like I am walking that space in between worlds, the new and the old. It is difficult because of this liminal sense to chat with folks I am meeting at this workshop about what I do and where I live...it all feels foreign and old or strange. Old story. I realize now more than before what Don Juan means by erasing personal history. Every time someone asks me a mundane question I feel as though they are asking me to reconfirm my personal history, to re-cement myself in my old roles and ways of being. Which is pretty normal, this is waht we do as humans in community, we have roles.
I am curious to experience my return home to Boulder. Very glad to have the task of redecorating my room to reflect myself as this initiated woman. And talk with friends slowly, quietly about what I have brought back. To share myself gently and wildly as the case may be in a way that makes me feel alive with my community. I want to go camping more.
ahhhh...well, back to class for the evening session. Please write or call if you like, I do get phone and internet reception here. It could be nice to talk with the folks at home.
I have been so grateful to have all of the treasures sent along from trail mix, which I finished just days ago, and stones, and camping gear, and medicines, and power objects. I made a little altar in the console of my car and have made many offerings along the way with your gifts...I look forward to sharing with each of you how your gift has travelling with me, how it was offered to the earth sky fire and so on...I would love to hear how all of you are doing as well...grateful to touch in with the circle.
LOVE.
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
just poking my head up from the underworld, making sure that this blog still works...hey, it does. and, I'm alive. my heart is broken open by beauty and I am feeling very tender from a re-membrance of soul. I emerged from the desert today and am landed at a friend's house in Los Angeles. There was a dinner gathering tonight, which was fun, and now I am settling into just how deeply I miss the wild moon silently gliding across the desert sky and the circle of twelve vision questers.
more in the light of day.
love to all of you, my family, and holders of the sacred flame in Boulder.
more in the light of day.
love to all of you, my family, and holders of the sacred flame in Boulder.
